If you’re trying to reach 100% fluency, it’s not going to happen. It is all about baby steps. Walk before you run and all that.
There’s no denying that curing a stutter is impossible. You’ll never do it. You can only control it. That ability of stutter manageability is what you should be striving for because otherwise, you’re just giving yourself a hard time.
I mean, do you really want to let your speech dominate your life?
Of the millions of people affected with a stuttering disorder, they (mostly) do live happy lives. They manage to make friends, and maintain relationships. Granted, in the youth years it’s more difficult but as your social circle ages with you, so too does acceptance. Only that’s likely not going to work with yourself.
There’s a huge problem those with a stutter are challenged with, and that is self-acceptance. You may not be happy with how you speak, but it’s the hand you’ve been dealt. It doesn’t mean that things have to stay that way though.
Or does it?
For some that may be. For others, they manage to somehow push through and ultimately are able to control their speech in many a situation.
Self-help for your speech
The only person who can help you is you. People like me can assist you on your journey by giving pointers, advice, tips and techniques and perhaps even coaching. This is your journey and a journey it will be. The only thing you have as a compass to direct you are visualisation.
Imagine yourself on a podium as a keynote speaker, in a job interview, explaining to your child how to work out a math problem. You need to know your reason for wanting to control your speech better. Think of it as a superpower. What will you do with the power to communicate without barriers?
Belief is a powerful tool to have and you absolutely must have it to change anything about you that you want to. You have to believe that you can.
Ask yourself this…
Do you speak fluently when you’re alone?
The majority of those who stutter do and if you can answer yes to that, you have hope. You only need to add to that discipline, tenacity and a ferociousness to fight for what you believe you can win.
That win will be better speech, the day when you can converse openly and relaxed, without worry. The thoughts and anxieties won’t go away, but they’ll also not trip you up.
Any form of self-improvement takes hard work. You can’t change your circadian rhythm over night, but you most certainly can reset your sleep cycle, naturally.
Now if you can change what you do when you’re sleeping, you can definitely change your behaviours when you’re awake.
The most challenging part of striving for better speech
What you’re going to find the most difficult is changing your thinking. Your stutter is both physical and emotional and it’s the emotions you associate with it that trigger it to become worse.
That’s why you find yourself stuttering more when you’re hyper-stressed. The tenser you are, the more work your facial muscles have to do, the more thoughts that race through your mind, and the words get trapped, and so do you.
It’s a vicious circle and it’s hard to break but break it you can. Break the habit by changing your thinking. Think positive, stay motivated; focus on changing your speech and thinking patterns, and practice solo speaking, because that’s what’ll make the world of difference.
Strive for control. Not complete fluency. If you’ve tried any techniques, or even therapy to get rid of your stutter, you’ve likely skipped right past the first part of acceptance. Accept it first, believe it second, and then take your journey to improve it yourself. Even speech therapists can only point you in the right direction with tips and techniques, but it’s your belief that will ultimately lead you to take control of your tongue.
Stick it out.